dissonates | [Voice / Action]

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...It's too quiet outside. When is that stupid holiday again? Whatever's going on needs to end.

[Private to Natalia]

Natalia... can we talk?

[He's nervous about talking to either of them, but- shortly after that entry is out of the way, Asch will be leaving his room to look for Guy and, if she says yes, Natalia, too. Unfortunately as soon as he leaves his room, his clothes are suddenly changed to this. Let's see how long it takes for him to notice. |D]

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Because I didn't know. I don't-

Asch, I don't even notice half the time. I just... [For the first time in a long time, Guy seems to be unable to explain himself. He goes back to rubbing his arm, frustrated.]

And when I point it out to you, you get defensive and deny it's even happening. What do you expect me to do, Guy?

...nothing. I didn't expect you to do anything.

[...Sigh. Asch curses inwardly, closing his eyes, then tugs Guy's hand gently away from his arm, taking it in his own hand instead. His voice is quiet when he speaks again, a little uncertain, but not with the intention of sounding insincere.]

I know you don't do this with the intention of hurting me. That's why you don't notice, right? ...I get that. [It's a hard thing to acknowledge, let alone accept, but he can understand it.] And... I'm sorry. ...That I'm not better at telling you why I'm upset.

[It's his problem too, he knows. They both made a mess of all of this. Again.

And Guy's words creep back into his thoughts, against his will: maybe he should leave. He doesn't seem to be helping matters any.]

[Guy stares down at their hands instead of their toes, his posture tight and uncomfortable.]

...you don't have anything to apologize for. ["You never did."]

[Asch gives Guy's hand a light squeeze. His mother used to do that, on the rare occasions that she caught him looking nervous about something. Every little bit helped- that was the saying, right?]

There's only so much I can do. There isn't much you let me do.

[Guy presses the heel of his hand to his forehead; he runs through every instance in his mind. Every time things got to be too much, here in Luceti...back home, he would take his aggression out on the monsters they fought, or he would separate himself from the group to think. What has he done here? No monsters, not enough space to separate...

I took it out on Asch. Every single time.

He was like that before, he knows. He'd nitpick tiny details, criticize every decision Asch made. Look down his nose at him, chalk up all his inadequacies to his relation to that man. That man.

Is that really all it boils down to? Guy still hating Fabre, still bitter over Hod?

There wasn't any other explanation for it. He could list exactly why he loved Asch; he was strong, he was loyal. He was honorable, he was kind to those who needed it the most. He was steadfast with a powerful sense of justice and the courage to pursue the right course of action no matter how difficult the path might be. Guy had no reason to blame Asch for anything that went wrong.

No reason other than what was already there.

His hand tightens around Asch's and he ducks his head further, shoulders drawing up.]

I'm sorry...!

[Guy seems to have realized it, and while it's a relief, Asch isn't sure if he's going to like the results of this conversation. Hopefully it won't backfire on him or something. He hadn't wanted to make Guy feel guilty or anything, but... dammit, he really was tired of it. He'd gotten enough of that kind of treatment when Guy still hated him.

He lifts his free hand to grasp lightly at the material of Guy's vest, not sure of what to say. Maybe it's better if Guy just lets it all out.]

[Guy takes a brief moment to reorganize his thoughts and regain his composure before he gently removes Asch's hand from his vest. He takes a deep breath.]

Asch, I don't know if I'll ever be able to stop thinking of you as Fabre's son. [With Luke, it was easier. With Luke, there was the transition; he raised Luke from infancy to present date, and Luke had clung to him like a baby would. Sometimes he still did. Guy viewed Luke almost more as his than Fabre's.] So the only other option is for me to...get over this.

...I don't know if that'll ever happen either. I can't make you any promises.

[Asch isn't sure if he should be surprised or not. The thought that this situation might never change, that Guy might keep doing this... it's a little frightening, because he's not sure how many times he can just accept it quietly before he really snaps. He can understand why, and he can tell himself the reason behind it over and over, but that doesn't make it affect him any less.

So what's the right answer here? What is he supposed to do...?]

I can't promise you that I'll be okay with this, either. I can pretend, but I still...

[...he feels it, every time. And every time it hurts.]

I don't want you to pretend. You shouldn't have to pretend.

[Something clenches tight in Guy's chest.]

...maybe we should split up.

[Asch is quiet for a long moment at that, hands falling to his sides.]

...Is that what you want?

We're not going by what I want this time.

...I don't want to just give up and run way. That's a cowardly way of dealing with this.

[And to try and prove his point, he lets his pack fall to the ground, eyes narrowing again.]

This isn't just about me.

Yes, it is. This is about whether or not it's fair to expect you to put up with this.

[Guy slowly releases Asch's hands to rub the back of his neck.]

And it's not. ...and I can't guarantee it won't happen again.

[That right there... is sounds so much like an ending, it's depressing. Even if Guy doesn't mean it in that sense - and Asch isn't sure whether or not he does - he can't shake the feeling that it's already over. Still... he can't help but grasp at it. Anything less feels too much like giving up.]

You put up with a lot more from me.

[Is he just stalling at this point? Has Guy already made up his mind?]

You were all ready to leave a second ago, Asch. Where'd that conviction run off to?

I thought there was a difference between taking off for a while and this...!

[That was- it was a threat. A way to get Guy to speak up. He'd never imagined it would go this far.]

Maybe that's what we should do. [Guy rubs his arm before he becomes conscious of it and stops, clenching his sleeve.] Just run away from each other for a while.

[Asch stares at Guy for a long moment, eyes widening a little. This is what he wants, isn't it? Whether he's doing it for Asch's sake or his own is irrelevant. He... thinks this is for the best. That it's what they need. And Asch doesn't have any arguments left that Guy can't easily dispel.

This is it.]

-Guy...

[And a moment later, the hurt, the anger, all of it- it's gone, replaced by his familiar old mask, the one he'd relied on for so long to protect himself. Without uttering another word he reaches down to grab his bag, then pushes past Guy and starts forward on the path leading away from the house once more.]

[If it was just a bluff, Asch wouldn't have packed his bag as if he really was leaving.

This is for the best.

Guy tells himself that as he clutches his sleeve and watches Asch go.]

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[Voice / Action]

[Action]

[Action] I see you

[Action] shhhhh; I can't get on AIM, my boss should be visiting soon. after that, though.

[Action] /lips are sealed :|b

[Action] /seals lips 8|

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