dissonates | (no subject)

[Oh, good, a chance to be useful. Asch nods idly and slips out of bed, giving Guy's hand a light squeeze.]

I'll make something small. Just wait here for a while.

I can go in the kitchen and help! [Guy calls after Asch, knowing he'll just be told to shut up and stay put anyhow. Ignore the coughs following that shout, please.]

Shut up and stay in bed!

[Ahh, so predictable. But that's okay. Off to the kitchen to get some food! Since soup is good for most illnesses, Asch is going to whip up a nice fancy ramen-esque seafood broth. And it will taste damned delicious. ... To Guy, of course.

[Ahhh, it was worth a shot. Guy laughs a bit, though; typical Asch. Hey, that smells good! Better bring it quick or Guy'll come out there to get it.]

[Never rush good food, you brat. Regardless, not too long after Asch returns with a bowl of aforementioned fishy broth, complete with a spoon and a fresh glass of water.]

I didn't taste it, but it smells good. If you don't like it I'll make something else, I guess.

[Ahhh, more soup? That's getting a little old; solid food would be nice, but then again it probably wouldn't do to throw up all of Asch's hard work. Oh well, it smells divine anyhow, so Guy makes grabby hands at it.]

[More of a chunky soup, Guy; give the boy some credit. Asch offers out the bowl, keeping a hand on it to make sure Guy isn't going to drop it all over himself.]

[Om nom nom; Asch can probably tell that Guy really likes it by the enthusiastic eating he's doing. This is tasty like what, child.]

[Asch makes a mental note to make it again, even if it does make the kitchen smell like fish. At least Guy likes it, so Asch is going to watch in amusement and a bit of pride while he eats.]

[Mmmm...Guy finishes -not in record time, because eating too fast would make him throw up- and sets the bowl on the nightstand, satisfied.]

Thanks, Asch. I know you hate seafood, but I love it.

[Asch waits patiently while he eats, smiling faintly when he's done. It's good that it turned out well.]

I'm fine with making it, so it wasn't a problem. I'm just glad you're doing better.

[Guy kind of feels like a jerk for bringing this up after Asch went to the trouble of making him soup...but damn it it's for the boy's own good too. So he lifts his journal, opening it to Asch's entry and holds it out to him.]

I am. So maybe you shouldn't be so tense.

.....

[Asch only glances at the entry for a moment before averting his eyes with a scowl, fingers clenching in his pants. The fact that it gets a reaction out of him is proof enough that he knows better.]

I-it's not my fault people don't know when to leave me alone.

[Guy sighs and lowers the journal before setting it aside and shoving the covers away to sit at the edge of his bed.]

Asch...

[Asch resists the urge to snap; things like illnesses made him edgy, and it had been a long time since he'd had to really deal with it. With Guy on the mend it's starting to get easier, but the scare kind of persists.]

....I'm fine. Just focus on getting better.

That's what I'm talking about, that right there. [Guy reaches over to touch Asch's cheek.] Why can't you show other people the same care and consideration you show me?

[He blinks, lifting his head a little. Why...? He'd always been snippy, always on the brink of a fight with whoever decided to push the wrong buttons. With Guy, though...]

...I... don't like making you angry. I don't like it when you're upset. I lose a lot more when you...

[Dammit, why was everything so hard to say?]

[Don't worry Asch, the next part is hard for Guy to say, too.]

And what if I die? What if I get sent home, or if something happens to me and I don't come back? [Guy brushes his thumb over Asch's cheek.] I don't want to see you go back to being all alone.

[Asch's expression breaks a little at that before he manages to conceal it.]

You think I haven't thought about that!? You've already been taken from here twice, and both times you forgot everything! All this could be some stupid game to them, and they could just do it again while I--!

[He cuts himself off, pushing himself to his feet and moving to the window. Outside, it's snowing lightly, and he focuses on that instead of looking at Guy again. His chest hurts.]

...It scares me.

[Guy gets up, follows Asch to the window. Slips his arms over Asch's shoulders, clasps his hands over his chest, tucks his face against his neck.]

...Me too.

[Asch nearly protested, wanting Guy to go back to bed and keep resting, but the embrace was too tempting, and he couldn't help but close his eyes, resting his head against Guy's hair.]

It's why I've been on edge. It's... why I've gotten possessive of you. I keep waiting for the day when I won't find you... when you'll come back and you'll have forgotten all of this. When that happens you'll go back to the replica, just like before. So... I want to have you, while I can...

[Guy nuzzles the side of Asch's neck.]

You can have me, as long as we can manage it. But...I want you to at least try and be happy even if I'm not around. I want to know that even without me here to make you smile, that you'll still be able to do it.

[A tall order, considering how many of Asch's smiles Guy could take credit for, now. It's far less often that he smiles for his own sake, rather than a smirk at the expense of someone else.]

I've been trying. I don't like getting angry all the time, I just... I've been this way for a long time. I don't trust people... and I know I'm not good at talking to anyone, so I always react badly...

[Why couldn't it come more naturally to him? Why couldn't he have turned adversity into charm, like Guy? Maybe his smiles weren't always genuine, but they made people feel good.]

I know you're trying. I know. And I'm proud of you. [Guy's arms tighten around Asch a bit, and he doesn't lift his head.] I just...worry about you sometimes.

[Asch lifts his hands to grip Guy's arms, shaking a little in his embrace. He doesn't want to say it but his head's screaming to let it out before he breaks.]

I don't... want you to go back. I don't want you to hate me again.

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